A Giant Success
I woke up this morning at 5:41am wide awake.
I never wake up that early - NEVER. Especially not when I went to sleep at 12:01am.... That is less than six hours of sleep! And heaven knows I need sleep!
As I laid staring at my ceiling this morning I asked the Lord, "What is it you want me to do?" (Because normally when I wake up from a dead sleep WIDE AWAKE, He is doing something)
He said, "Pray."
I started to thank the Lord for everything He has done this past year. All the wonderful things He has done in my life. Today is my birthday if you were unaware. I looked back over everything that has happened, the good, the bad and the ugly. To me, there were a lot more ugly moments than good moments, but unlike most times I could see how gloriously the Lord used all those ugly moments to change and mold my heart and mind. I could see how I am so different! So not the girl I was twelve months ago.
So I asked Jesus, "How do you feel about this past year?"
He said, "A giant success."
It was like I could see the cumulation of all the little moments in this last year, all the hardship and pain, all the regret and victories, all the joy and celebration, form into one huge word.
SUCCESS.
I cried.
He continued, "I am so pleased with you this year. Everything I desired to accomplish in you has been completed. This year was a GIANT SUCCESS."
For those two words, everything has been worth it. EVERYTHING. I would gladly walk the road I had to walk again for those two words to be spoken over my life again. I would gladly take all the awful to have His approval and love. (Not that I needed to do anything to gain it.)
This year has been the hardest year of my life, I transitioned out of CEF, I struggled personally with fear and insecurity, I battled worthlessness and rejection on a completely different level than ever before in my life. This year has been so hard, but so WORTH IT.
I can never stress enough how WORTH everything it is to completely follow the Lord.
His plan is always good. His motives always right. You can't go wrong if you are completely abandoned to His plan for your life.
I'm so incredibly thankful. So incredibly thankful for Jesus.
I can't wait to see what happens this year!
I never wake up that early - NEVER. Especially not when I went to sleep at 12:01am.... That is less than six hours of sleep! And heaven knows I need sleep!
As I laid staring at my ceiling this morning I asked the Lord, "What is it you want me to do?" (Because normally when I wake up from a dead sleep WIDE AWAKE, He is doing something)
He said, "Pray."
I started to thank the Lord for everything He has done this past year. All the wonderful things He has done in my life. Today is my birthday if you were unaware. I looked back over everything that has happened, the good, the bad and the ugly. To me, there were a lot more ugly moments than good moments, but unlike most times I could see how gloriously the Lord used all those ugly moments to change and mold my heart and mind. I could see how I am so different! So not the girl I was twelve months ago.
So I asked Jesus, "How do you feel about this past year?"
He said, "A giant success."
It was like I could see the cumulation of all the little moments in this last year, all the hardship and pain, all the regret and victories, all the joy and celebration, form into one huge word.
SUCCESS.
I cried.
He continued, "I am so pleased with you this year. Everything I desired to accomplish in you has been completed. This year was a GIANT SUCCESS."
For those two words, everything has been worth it. EVERYTHING. I would gladly walk the road I had to walk again for those two words to be spoken over my life again. I would gladly take all the awful to have His approval and love. (Not that I needed to do anything to gain it.)
This year has been the hardest year of my life, I transitioned out of CEF, I struggled personally with fear and insecurity, I battled worthlessness and rejection on a completely different level than ever before in my life. This year has been so hard, but so WORTH IT.
I can never stress enough how WORTH everything it is to completely follow the Lord.
His plan is always good. His motives always right. You can't go wrong if you are completely abandoned to His plan for your life.
I'm so incredibly thankful. So incredibly thankful for Jesus.
I can't wait to see what happens this year!
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